absinthe-an alcoholic beverage that contains an extract of the wormwood plant. Popular in 19th Century France among artists and poets, the drink was subsequently banned and largely forgotten about. Farrell has rekindled the charm of this fine beverage; he prepares it with the help of all the appropriate paraphernalia, including oddly slotted spoons designed for the sole purpose of holding a sugar cube over which the wormwood extract is poured on its way down to the alcohol. The inebriation resulting from the drinking of absinthe is entirely different from other forms of intoxication. It seems that the chemistry of the wormwood makes the drinker more drowsy, and hot and tingly in parts of the body such as the ears and cheeks.
acetaminophine-the active substance in Tylenol. Occasionally added to cough remedies that also contain Dextromethorphan. Such concoctions cannot be used for the purposes of tussing, since they will cause the tusser to suffer from a destroyed liver some sixteen hours later as the clean acetaminophine metabolic pathways are deluged and messier, poisonous metabolic pathways in the liver are used instead.
acid-this term might be used to refer to LSD, but a less obvious meaning for this term is the sort of music played on a consistent but non-western scale by such bands as Nation of Ulysses and Drill for Absentee. Raphæl, Zachary and the Gus frequently play in an acid manner, also. It is doubtful, however, that Jamie Dyer often does.
acid jazz-what Bad Tractor claimed Jessika was at the infamous Housewarming Party. Apparently this is an appealing thing to be, since Jessika was forced to hide in a closet from Bad Tractor later that evening.
agro-distressed at the lack of drugs both in ones body and in ones possession. The word is short for "aggravated" and was introduced into the lingo of Big Fun upon the return of Shira and Sara from Philadelphia in mid-March 1996. Agro is a fire-sign emotion, not a water-sign emotion.
air-one of the four ancient elements. In astrology, air implies intellect, reason and philosophy. Air signs are Gemini, Libra, and Aquarius. At Big Fun, air signs seem to get the most respect. This is partly because they constitute the overwhelming majority of the people there on any given evening. People who have too much air in their charts are characterized by overconfidence in their own brilliance. For example, when Matthew Hart had to replace a broken window at the mansion on Fairview Farms, he went to the hardware store bearing no measurements, confident that he would "know" the size of the pane of glass he needed when he saw it, and if that wasn't the case, he could get a larger piece of glass and "smash it against a rock and it will break to the right size."
album cover-a certain elusive state that occurs during tussin euphoria outdoors at night in which one feels he is posing on an album cover. This normally occurs while people are standing around, the wind is blowing, and the clouds are racing past a particularly bright moon.
Alien, the-Wei Liu, an oriental guy with very closely cropped hair, famous for walking around robotically on the Downtown Mall and more recently on the Corner. The Alien is known to have stalked a number of girls, especially those who are crunchy, are either pregnant or have children, and are connected in some way with Jerusalem.
In the months of January and February, 1996, Jessika turned tables on the Alien and stalked him back to his home as well as doing such things as preparing him lunches. These he has refused, asking very coldly, "Do I know you?" in such a way as to make anyone overhearing him convinced they have taken a very powerful evil drug.
One of the few things that is known of the Alien is that he views the world as though it is his personal movie. He is also reportedly obsessive-compulsive.
The Gus thinks that Wei may in fact be an alien space craft that is still in the process of construction. At this point, the space craft looks enough like a human to blend into the sidewalk traffic of Charlottesville. Most people think something is amiss, true, but there are plenty of people in need of more Thorazine in Jefferson's City. What the tiny aliens within Spacecraft Wei are doing is piloting the ship around amongst the humans, gathering data on their social behaviour and facial movements. The idea here is to know exactly what pistons and pulleys to add to the space ship to make it seem more human. You can tell Wei is gathering data all the time; why else, as he cruises by, does he mechanically turn his head and focus on people sitting and talking?
Someone played a cruel trick on Wei in early April, 1996, stenciling the mysterious slogan "THIS WEI-->" all over downtown and the Corner. As paranoid as Wei likely is, this probably pushed him over some sort of psychopathic cliff. He disappeared for a few weeks immediately following the appearance of this stencil design.
The latest news on Wei is that, in June of 1996, he departed to live in California.
Allie-a Gemini female (with a very similar astrologic chart to Sara Poiron) who had caused a certain amount of puzzlement in the minds of the residents of Big Fun because she had been seen at times in the company of the Gus. Perhaps, it was wondered, the Gus may not be as androgynous as first thought.
Altamont-refers to the first place Jessika and Sara lived in Charlottesville in April and May of 1995. Unfortunately a psychotic neighbor downstairs could not even tolerate the noise of their quietest footstep, and so on the day of his leaving, managed to get them evicted.
Altamont, The-the large building on the top of the hill overlooking downtown Charlottesville. In addition to being the overheated residence of Farrell and a lot of retired old people, the Altamont's roof is a choice place to drink beer and smoke santa clause on warm summer days.
alterna-chick-a girl who pursues fashion goals entirely of her own making, perhaps borrowing here and there from various trends. Bad Ironing Board used this term to describe Jessika. He also accurately determined that she used to be crunchy.
alternative-at obvious variance with the mainstream, especially regarding music, lifestyle and clothing. Clothing and the extent of facial piercings are usually the most apparent manifestations of underlying alternative sentiments. But like every other term that may have once had meaning, the term "alternative" has been co-opted by mainstream commercial culture. It isn't easy to maintain a rebellion when you find yourself winning every battle.
As the name for a musical genré, alternative is reserved for a type of college radio pop that typically breaks free of such rock and roll rules as the major/blues scales, the 4/4 rhythm, hi fidelity, and the need for rhyming lyrics. There is, however, plenty of "alternative" that is hard to distinguish from classic rock. These days much of the new rock and roll that mainstream rock stations play is stuff that would have been considered alternative only a year or two before.
Althia Hurt-the tyrannical
landlord of all of Fairview Farms' several
houses, including Big Fun and the residence of Peirce
and Nelly. Althia Hurt has a reputation for all sorts of sinister behaviour,
including taking the Dragon to the SPCA, attempted
seductions of both Farmer Dan and his teenage
son, using sex to manipulate a judge's decision about the ownership of
Big Fun, and perhaps other things, some of which may only be idle gossip.
psychotic medication. When it is used recreationally, one becomes, according
to Sara Poiron, "Very sedate feeling and
disoriented until they pass out, only to wake up the next day and discover
that, much like nutmeg it's still there. It
seems to be out of your system by the third day." Sara claims that
she had no fun with this drug and she does not recommend it "as something
that will aid anyone in their quest for bigger fun." Others who have
tried amytriptilene at Big Fun include Matthew Hart
and Soiled Little Boy's Underpants. Peggy
derisively calls amytriptilene "Amy-trampoline" perhaps referring
to the lack of balance one experiences under its effects.
amytriptilene-an anti psychotic medication. When it is used recreationally, one becomes, according to Sara Poiron, "Very sedate feeling and disoriented until they pass out, only to wake up the next day and discover that, much like nutmeg it's still there. It seems to be out of your system by the third day." Sara claims that she had no fun with this drug and she does not recommend it "as something that will aid anyone in their quest for bigger fun." Others who have tried amytriptilene at Big Fun include Matthew Hart and Soiled Little Boy's Underpants. Peggy derisively calls amytriptilene "Amy-trampoline" perhaps referring to the lack of balance one experiences under its effects.
analbludsnak-the name of a band that was to open for Drill for Absentee at Big Fun on March 1, 1996. Brandon of Two Point Five Children had come up with a slightly different name, but by the time the Gus got around to making the flyer, the name had changed to "analbludsnak." Membership in analbludsnak never was fixed, so most in the world of Big Fun, especially Matthew Hart, are self-proclaimed members.
A version of analbludsnak actually played at the March 1st 1996 Drill for Absentee show, and its membership consisted mostly of Two Point Five Children and the Gus. They played until Raphæl launched into a solo performance of his own.
At the Woodstock-like Rising Sun Bakery benefit party held on April 20th at Peirce and Nelly's to the south (attended by 600 or so people), an incarnation of analbludsnak called "The Big Fun Country Band" (featuring Dennis and Brandon of Two Point Five Children on keyboards, Ray and then Zachary on drums, Kevin the Taurus of Philadelphia on guitar, and the Gus on bass) performed an enthusiastic set. Later the Gus discovered he had bled all over the bass while playing things such as the bass line to Joy Division's "She's Lost Control." The owner of the bass was not pleased; Jessika and Nelly saw him change all his strings and thoroughly disinfect everything else. Perhaps he was afraid of being infected by the virus that causes Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome. He probably would have just thrown the bass away had the band been billed under the name "analbludsnak"!
analingus-the practice of achieving sexual excitement by one person licking the anus of another. Labeling on packages of dental dams delivered by Mellow D from Integral Yoga professed that dental dams make this practice somewhat safer. Analingus is often used as a rhetorical expression to make a statement humourous. Sara Poiron at one time found this term highly objectionable, and placed it on a short list of terms not be used in her room. But with repeated use, the word has come to lose its stigma.
anarchy-a state of no rules, where everyone is left to be totally free. The issue of who fills the pot holes under such a regime has never been acceptably answered. At Big Fun, an anarchistic utopia exists, and exactly who washes the dishes and cleans out the cat box is still a mystery. For the most part, though, dirty dishes accumulate, as does kitty litter, grime and graffiti. When the toilets don't flush, people still defecate in them, perhaps following the example of the cats with their litter box. In March 1996, the cats began having sex. There was once talk of getting them fixed, but I haven't even heard such talk lately. The prediction I made was that Senovia would become an aunt and a mother the same day that Pywacket became an uncle and a father (and Stink would become a father that same day). This prediction came true on June 11, 1996, the evening of the Nomadic Festival, when Senovia gave birth to the Gemini Kittens.
Anastasia-this woman claimed to be the only living descendant of Czar Nicholas II of Russia, and thus both a Gemini and heir to the Russian throne should it ever be reinstated. When Anastasia died, a posthumous investigation revealed that all of the family of the Czar were killed by communist revolutionaries shortly after the glorious October Revolution of 1917; DNA tests indicated that "Anastasia" was just a humble Polish maid for the family. Jessika, however, has heard that the DNA samples were terribly contaminated and that we may never know for sure; Jessika would like to believe that Anastasia really was heir to the Russian throne. Why this has anything to do with Big Fun is that this Anastasia lived for a long time in the mansion on Fairview Farms, presiding as tyrannical landlord in the days before Althia Hurt.
androgynous-lacking strong male or female attributes, in the manner of David Bowie (a Capricorn). Sara Poiron often finds her male friends (particularly the Gus, Matthew Hart and even Ray) to be androgynous after some time has passed and they have not yet acted in the slimy fashion which, with considerable experience, she has come to expect of her male friends.
Angela's-a trailer in an abandoned trailer park in Malvern where the dissolute youth of that area hung out and lived a life of blissful anarchy. This was in the days before the discovery of Charlottesville.
Jessika had once met a girl named Angela who had lived there. But Angela had subsequently died and all the trailers had been evacuated, seemingly in a hurry (for many things, including personal photographs, had been left behind). In tribute to Angela, the Malvern kids named everything, even the surrounding woods, after her.
At Angela's, drug taking and beer drinking were the rule. There were even a number of creature comforts; Turtle's genius led to the obtaining of free electricity from nearby power lines. This youthful utopia persisted for a time until the police discovered the community, confiscated all the drugs and alcohol, put up yellow tape, and saw to it that no one returned.
Aquarius-the 11th sign of the zodiac. The sun passes through this sign in late January through mid February. This sign is a fixed air sign and people born with heavenly bodies, the horizon, or most particularly the sun in it tend to be eccentric, ingenious, detached, erratic and insane. The sign is typical of people who are leaders in movements to create radical changes in the dominant paradigm. Since the sign is fixed, it endows its natives with the ability to complete projects that other air signs utterly lack. Famous people who have Aquarius for a sun sign include Franklin Roosevelt, Ronald Reagan, Bob Marley, Mikhail Baryshnikov, the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz, and Abraham Lincoln. Aquarians associating with or known to Big Fun include Farrell, Matthew Hart, Deya, Morgan Anarchy, KC, Savitri's older sister Shanti, Leah (a recent girlfriend of Matthew Hart), the Gus, a lemon that received an Aquarius tattoo from Sara, and the woman that spawned Jessika.
Aries-the first sign of the zodiac. The sun passes through this sign in late March through mid April. The sign is a cardinal fire sign and people born with heavenly bodies, the horizon, or most particularly the sun in it tend to be egocentric, assertive, bold, commanding, sexually aggressive and possessive. The sign is typical of drug dealers and other people who enjoy showing off and taking control, especially if others are taking notice. The sign is ultimately one of a "fire starter" since that is what "cardinal fire" means. Often fire starters, such as Bad Cheese, use their fire starting as a technique to show the command they have over the world. It isn't known, however, what the astrology of Bad Cheese ultimately consists of. Famous people who have Aries for a sun sign include Thomas Jefferson, Hugh Hefner, Marlon Brando and Adolph Hitler (does the term "Aryan" sound familiar?). People known to Big Fun who have the sun in Aries include Michæl Nace, Annette Baker of Jerusalem, Josh Smith, Savitri Durkee, Senoma, and half the male population of Malvern. At Big Fun, there is a general dislike for Aries that may actually be due to some deep-seated envy. Even arrogance can be an enviable trait if there is justification for it.
Aries Pen-a measure of to what extent Aries are held in contempt at Big Fun is the name of a small fenced-in part of the Big Fun backyard adjacent to a little shed. Believed to have once served as a pig pen, it is now called the "Aries Pen." Interestingly, many rabbits are born in late March and early April; should Big Fun ever decide to raise rabbits, it is likely that the Aries Pen would confine a majority Aries population. In the mean time, however, the Aries Pen serves as a disposal site for decomposing kitchen wastes.
art murderer-someone who destroys art as casually as one might swat a fly. Sara Poiron labeled Josh Smith "the art murderer" in early December, 1995, in the first ever use of this term after he balled up and threw away her manifesto on the mediocrity of everyone in our species.
art opening-when someone has toiled long hours on their art and gotten the chance to finally hang it in a gallery, they are so proud of themselves that they think nothing of spending ample money on vino and eats for the people kind enough to come and look at the fruits of their creativity. For artist and non-artist alike, then, Charlottesville is a fine place on the first Friday of every month. For eats and vino are then available in copious amounts and it is all free. Try not to be a jackass, however; stand for a moment in front of some of the art and act like you are being moved even if the stuff looks like it was done by your five year old nephew.
asbestos wood-wood at Big Fun that will not burn no matter what accelerants are used, no matter what Aries is doing the fire starting. This wood was purchased in several waves. The largest of these waves came in a truck load purchased by Turtle as he departed Big Fun following the infamous house warming party.
ascendant-the rising sign. For awhile it was thought at Big Fun that the East Point and the ascendant were one in the same. Thus Deya would have an Aquarius ascendant and Sara would have a Pisces ascendant. But it turns out that the East Point is the rising sign on the Equator, while the ascendant is the rising sign at the birthplace of an individual. The ascendant is used as the site of the cusp between the 1st and 12th house. Thus Deya has a Capricorn ascendant and Sara has an Aquarius ascendant.
ash tray-a receptacle for the deposition of cigarette ashes as they form on a burning cigarette. In Big Fun, any structure with a concave surface can serve as an ashtray. The following items have been used as ash trays: beer and vino bottles, bowls and cups, a very overcooked pizza, the electric heater in the kitchen, bowls of salsa not dipped in for at least ten seconds, the fire places, and perhaps even a passed-out drunk's navel. Josh Smith went out and purchased a number of ash trays once, but most of those have probably been broken by now.
aspect-the relationship between heavenly bodies (including the horizon) in an astrological chart, or between heavenly bodies in the charts of several people.
Astrolog-the only freeware astrology program that runs nicely on a Macintosh computes. Unfortunately, Astrolog has a very poor user interface and gives stiff canned interpretations of the elements of an astrological chart.
astrological chart-a circular chart showing in what signs and houses the various heavenly bodies, lunar nodes, horizons, and such were at the occasion of someones birth. Frequently, aspects such as trines, squares (crosses) and oppositions are drawn in on the chart. Careful analysis of an astrological chart can give powerful insights about someones personality. The Pegger, Sara and Jessika have created many charts over the years in their pursuit of the truth about what is up with their various friends and acquaintances. Recently, the Astrolog program has been used to automate the laborious chart searches that chart creation normally entails. The term "astrological chart" is usually shortened to "chart" as in the common question at Big Fun, "Will you do my chart sometime?"
astrological sign-one of twelve sectors of the zodiac through which the Sun, Moon and planets pass as they cross the sky. The border between the sector of Pisces and that of Aries is placed at the center of the Sun at the moment of the vernal equinox (the instant the Sun crosses the equator on its way into the northern hemisphere). Other sign borders correspond to other seasonal mileposts; for example, the border between Sagittarius and Capricorn is marked by the Sun's position on the occasion of the Winter Solstice (~December 22). Each of the sectors is 30 degrees wide and is named after the constellation with which it had once corresponded. Due to the precession of the equinoxes, however, the astrological signs no longer correspond perfectly with the constellations. The term "astrological sign" is frequently shortened to simply "sign." Often "sign" is used to refer simply to the "Sun sign," that is, where the Sun was on the occasion of someones birth.
astrology-the field of study based upon the belief that the location of the heavenly bodies on the occasion of someones birth has a strong role in shaping their personality. Astrology as it is practiced at Big Fun is the same astrology that has been developed in our Western culture (with origins predating the Greeks and Phoenicians) but added to over the years as new planets, comets and asteroids have been discovered.
At Big Fun, astrology contributes in crucial ways to the language spoken there. If one does not know the characteristics of a Virgo or the significance of a Grand Water Trine, one will be at serious disadvantage in understanding the conversations that occur there.
One of the traits about astrology that makes it interesting both to believers and infidels is that it places so much focus on individuals that they invariably feel flattered as the parts of their chart are described to them.
as we speak-a conversational form of "right now."
attention deficit disorder (ADD)-a condition characterized by a short attention span and the inability to maintain long term focus on a project. This is an oversimplification, since at times people with attention deficit disorder demonstrate almost pathological focus on a subject, although eventually this focus will fade and be replaced by another compulsive focus on another subject. In the past ADD was termed "hyperactivity" since its major feature in youth is uncontrollable energy and an inability to pay attention. People with ADD show a great difference in IQ scores when tested orally versus in writing.
At Big Fun, the most serious victim of ADD is Sara Poiron. She has difficulty restraining herself from saying anything that comes to her mind or acting out in violent ways, although at the same time her level of intense focus leads to such thorough analysis of issues that many new things are discovered along the way. Her prescription of Ritalin (the drug most often used to treat ADD) provides an novel stimulant all the members of the Big Fun community enjoy amusing themselves with. Jamie Dyer has written a song about Sara's ADD that is rather entertaining.
attic, the-the part of Big Fun directly under the roof. There is very little of interest up there, just things like heat pump ducts, fiber glass insulation and old weathered boards. Now and then the Big Fun cats are known to hang out there as well. However, on occasion someone, usually a man with strong Aries tendencies, shows up at Big Fun thinking much adventure can be had in the attic, that perhaps ghosts live up there, and that Jessika should go up there with him to see. Similarly, Shira claims that an intoxicated the Gus (Saturn in Aries in the 12th house) asked her to go up there with him at the infamous house warming party, and she refused. She was, however, willing to sit briefly in a very cold Punch Buggy Green listening to Slayer.
awesome-a quality something has when it is of note. This word no longer always implies sublime or cool as it once did. Raphæl uses this word all the time, and when he says, "that's awesome" it does not necessarily mean he thinks something is wonderful; more likely it means he has simply noted the existence of something. Matthew Hart is also known to use this word, but usually it has more the meaning of "I'm impressed" when he does. The Gus can recall using this word when he was seventeen, but he never uses it now.
back in the day-some years ago. For the Gus, this usually means his Oberlin experience, the height of which occurred some five years ago. For Matthew Hart, "back in the day" is used to refer to his Waynesboro social life two or more years ago.
bad ass-usually at Big Fun a noun phrase that begins with "bad" has a negative connotation. Similarly, when a noun phrase ends with "ass" it does not speak well of that to which it refers. Ironically, however, the phrase "bad ass" is a term of sincere respect. A bad ass will take no shit from anyone without asserting himself, usually in either a violent or verbally adept manner. "Bad ass" can also be an adjective that means "tough in a cool way."
Bad Beef-a large man with long hair and reportedly amazing guitar playing talents who also lacks most social skills. His personality quickly caused chafing with that of Mellow D and the Pegger, although Sara Poiron, Matthew Hart and the Gus found him very amusing. They videotaped him reacting to a fictitious tale told by the Gus about supposedly being in prison for six years for child molestation. Sara Poiron has recently seen Bad Beef twice on the streets of Charlottesville.
Bad Bumper Sticker-a guy with long blond hair and a yellow four wheel drive vehicle festooned with numerous idiotic bumper stickers such as "Fuckinshrooming," "PHISH" and "Work sucks, I'm going on tour!" Bad Bumpersticker works at Higher Grounds and once told Sara Poiron to kindly get off of a table she was standing on out in front. "Henceforth," she decreed, "Higher Grounds shall be known as 'Poop.'" And she went off to the Rising Sun Bakery, which she then renamed Jerusalem. Of late, Sara has decided that Bad Bumpersticker is actually a pretty cool guy, though she still curses his vehicle when she sees it driving around on the streets of Charlottesville.
Bad Cheese- an allegedly amazing speed metal drummer with long blond head hair and cheesy facial hair. He is also relatively lacking in intellectual facilities, and has no luck starting fires, though he tries to often when he is at Big Fun. He is one of the guys who suggested there were ghosts in the Big Fun attic and that Big Fun "hasta have" a basement. He then reportedly showed Jessika his arm, presumably then festooned with goose bumps, an indication, he said, of the proximity of ghosts. In retrospect, Bad Cheese was fairly amusing, and we'd invite him back out to Big Fun again if only we could run across him on the streets of Charlottesville.
Bad Hair-the leader of "The Odyssey"- a band which appears at Big Fun whenever Sara Poiron goes "Ohhhmmmmmm." During one such visit Bad hair reportedly suggested living and practicing at Big Fun, and concluded the sentiment by following Sara around, begging her "Let's burn one." Bad Hair is also responsible for advertising an unapproved Big Fun party all over the streets of Charlottesville.
Bad Ironing Board-one of the bakers at Jerusalem, a Sagittarius with Scorpio rising and the Moon in Capricorn. His real name is Rami, though he also has a number of nicknames including "the Swami Rami" (Shira's invention) or "Count Rommula" (courtesy of the Gus). Rami entitles himself "Keeper of the Holy Flame of Jerusalem," a reference to the fact that he does much of his baking unsupervised in the wee hours of the morning. During his graveyard shift, Rami is an entertaining host to sleepless Charlottesville-bound Big Funsters who happen by. By day, however, Rami is famous for combining an awkwardly unsubtle social technique with a bravado violent streak that I have never seen him fully deploy.
The term "Bad Ironing Board" stems from a dumpster-diving diversion that occurred at the Altamont on Friday, January 19th, 1996 in the company of Jessika and the Gus. After the diving was over, Rami's trophy was a salvaged ironing board. That "bad" should be attached to his name is related to his concurrent amourous pursuit of Jessika, which was perhaps the most poorly executed I have ever witnessed on the streets of Charlottesville.
In his own defense, Rami claims he is subtle and that during his Jan. 19th interaction with Jessika he was "just clowning around" and not engaging in an "amourous pursuit." An appropriate response to such a defense is:
Revisions of history are typical of those who have "wreck[ed] their ships on Jessika's rocky shores" only to subsequently "discover what fools they have made of themselves."
In defense of my analysis I plead that I can only evaluate people based on what they actually do on the streets of Charlottesville.
bad karma-the negative quality an object has when it has been stolen. For example, at Big Fun, the drinking of bad karma beer soon after the Jehu End of the World Party caused Jessika and the Gus to fall ill with influenza.
Bad Sex-Michæl from Guatemala, a Gemini, one of the friends of the boys in black. Bad Sex is known mostly by the nickname "Kiki." As Kiki's hair grows more and more, he looks increasingly less emo and ever more like a computer nerd, which, like the Gus, he is. He and the Gus enjoy comparing specifications on each others' slide rules and computer equipment. Kiki is also a tussin fiend, drinking as many as sixteen ounces of extra strength tussin each day, along with more conventional drugs such as santa clause and alcohol. When very intoxicated, Kiki is given to referring to himself in third person and saying preposterous things such as "Gigi Allin!" "Kiki is a bad girl" and "It's all good makes the girls crawl."
The name "Bad Sex" is what Sara Poiron decided to call Kiki after a number of episodes wherein he seemed to enjoy being cut by a knife-wielding Jessika and a number of other episodes wherein he attempted to molest Ray over Sara while they all slept in her bed. Ray maintains, however, that in all actuality it was Sara doing all the molesting, though that's something I overheard him saying on the streets of Charlottesville.
Bad Toast-a seemingly mild-mannered Downtown Mall Regular, Bad Toast became a raving lunatic with sexual conquest on his mind at the infamous house warming party at Big Fun. When Sara threatened him with a baseball bat, he said that violence turned him on, and she hit him repeatedly. Later, Morgan and Ray literally threw him out the door. He was seen leaving Big Fun the next day as a successful hitchhiker on VA 20.
The time the Gus was thrown out of the liquor store for being too drunk, the evening was salvaged by the providential arrival of Bad Toast, who was of sufficient age to buy Matthew Hart, Jessika, Diana the Redhead and Deya their Two Fingers® Tequila.
Bad Toast, always with a knowing smile on his face, is frequently seen riding his pink fifteen speed bicycle on the streets of Charlottesville.
Bad Tractor-this guy, a Cancer, showed up at the infamous house warming party with a van full of mall rats, and proceeded to follow Jessika around the house, claiming she was "acid jazz" and "I didn't come all the way out here for my health, now what?" He offered to find her a car to race with him, but she wanted, she said, a tractor instead. Later Jessika hid from Bad Tractor in a closet.
Bad Tractor has told Shira and Sara that he only hangs out with the "available women" and thus he cannot hang out with them. To this, Shira says, "at least he doesn't think we're available."
It is customary for Shira, Sara and the Gus to sing, "Smoke on the water, fire in the sky" whenever they run across Bad Tractor on the streets of Charlottesville.
Banana Red-a flavour of Mad Dog appreciated by Morgan Anarchy and Matthew Hart and disliked by Jessika. Banana Red Mad Dog is, according to Matthew Hart, a big favourite with Johnny Boom Boom Mancini, whose "name must occur in any definition of that beverage." It is 13% alcohol and costs $5 for 750 mL on the Corner, but less than $3 for the same amount at a grocery store. The ingredients of Banana Red Mad Dog read something like "natural flavour and colouring." The "banana" is the flavour, obviously. But apparently the "red" is just colour. Who would have ever thought to colour a banana flavoured drink red? That's part of what makes Mad Dog so lovable. Matthew Hart suspects that the "pink" in "Pink Grapefruit Mad Dog" is just the colour and the flavour is not "pink grapefruit" but just "grapefruit."
basement, the-a nonexistent level of Big Fun that both Bad Cheese and Yayson claimed must exist beneath all else. In fact, below first floor, the house is held only a foot and a half above bare soil by concrete blocks. Cold air easily slides into this space and freezes pipes in the winter time.
bed time story-a tale that the Pegger used to request the Gus to tell her before she fell asleep in the days prior to Zachary's sharing her bed. Such tales often suffered from shoddy plot constructions and hopelessly anticlimactic endings.
beef-an issue of contention. To confront someone with a beef takes chutzpah and to do so sometimes results in a physical struggle.
believer-someone who accepts without challenge the contention that the positions of the heavenly bodies on the occasion of someones birth profoundly affects their personality.
Beltane-a Celtic fertility celebration that corresponds to May Day or the midway point of Spring (in the center of the Sun's sojourn in Taurus). Traditionally, Beltane is celebrated with orgies and a dance around the May Pole, a large, unabashedly phallic symbol.
A group of Charlottesville-area witches hosted a big Beltane celebration near Free Union (northwest of Charlottesville) on Saturday, May 4th, 1996. Farrell informed Big Fun of this, and so, despite a horrific thunderstorm, a contingent consisting of Sara, Shira, Jessika, Deya and the Gus drove in Deya's car to the site of the festivities, discretely marked with a pentagram. They parked on the road and sneaked in, full of anticipation of all the demented sexual acts they would be witness to; Farrell had told the Gus over the phone that the leader of the witches, a guy named Snehan, is a firm believer in absolutely uninhibited sex between animals and people regardless of gender and age (within legal limits, of course). After seeing one older gentleman's butt, the Big Fun contingent found its way to a bonfire and sat politely listening to some witches singing witchy songs. One such song had a chorus that went something like, "Oh hippie tie-dye/hippie tie-dye-ay." Before too long, a couple of witchy organizers for the event appeared and quizzed the Scottsville punks as to how they had managed to get in and, patronizingly (perhaps fearing legal problems when the orgies commenced) "how old are we?" He informed them that the ritual was a private affair that had a $5 admission fee and that they would have to leave. What an anti-climax to an evening so pregnant with possibilities! The only cool thing that came out of all of this was a stop at a Seven Eleven on the way to the ritual. It was at this time that Jessika became fascinated with the concept of eating a corn dog, examples of which the Seven Eleven had placed temptingly on display.
Ben the Cat-a skittish but beautiful female tiger cat that showed up on her own at Big Fun in mid April, 1996. She has a face nearly as flat as Stink's and one of her hind legs is orange. The sounds she makes are...well...not of this world. There's none of that clichéd "meow meow" stuff from her. Most people now call Ben "Lilith."
betty-the female sexual partner of someone. The implication of this word is that there is a "relationship" in effect, thus monogamy can also be inferred. This word infuriated Sara Poiron when Eric the Huffanator Huffman once used it to describe her visa vis Phil Ginini. Raphæl has also been heard to use this word to flavour his conversations, but usually his use of the word means simply "babe" or "chick" without an implication of a relationship to anyone.
bible trailer-a standard residential trailer parked just off the property of a public school wherein bible lessons are taught to public grade school students on a weekly basis. This somehow circumvents the church/state separations stemming from the first amendment of the federal constitution. Naturally, students not attending the bible lessons weekly are stigmatized in a fashion that is not conducive to self esteem in someone of such a tender age. Some people at Big Fun believe that good things are to be gained from the widespread burning of bible trailers.
big drink-the name given by the Raphæl to a mixed drink consisting of lemonade and vodka. The Brazilian Girls had another name for this concoction, which is made according to a recipe familiar to them, but Raphæl thought an easily pronounced English name was more appropriate. The drinking of the big drink, along with the drinking of gin, is what made the Gus into the Saturnine Aries monster he was on April 26 (see "blackout"). The Brazilian Girls attempted to get the Gus to drink the big drink again a week later, but he refused and drank burgundy boxed vino instead, resulting in only a minor outburst of Taurus rising.
big fun-a state in which for the most part all the people participating in an event are not bored, angry, sad, or asleep. When big fun is obviously no longer present, it is customary for Sara Poiron to say, "big fun has left the building."
Big Fun-at first this was the name of a videotaped movie that was in the works at the house that had been known as The Temple of Anastasia. Later, though, Zachary was heard answering the telephone "Big Fun"- and quickly that name stuck as the name for the isolated yellow house in the middle of the blowing field on Fairview Farms north of Scottsville, Virginia wherein lived the Pegger, Sara, Jessika, Zach and Josh.
big scary monster-the name of an icon that Zachary sometimes draws or mentions verbally. The big scary monster has a lumpish body, big wide-awake eyes, raised arms with menacing claws, and long sharp teeth displayed in an open mouth. A version of the big scary monster was tattooed on Zachary's body in early May 1996.
big trash-the pieces of furniture and old appliances that the trash man won't normally haul away. On certain set days each year, however, the trash man will take items of big trash. Such days are called "big trash days" and they are much anticipated by people with Taurus rising who are hoping to obtain free furniture for their residences.
bitch-a girl who is both detested and respected. The following witticism well exemplifies what is meant when one says bitch, "A slut will sleep with anyone, while a bitch will sleep with anyone but you."
blackout-an absence of light or an absence of memory. This term is used to describe the condition of Big Fun after Appalachian Power turned off the juice for lack of bill payment, but it is much more often used to describe the conditions of certain people after they have drunk so much alcohol that, while still being players in the events of the evening, they are not preserving memories of any of their activities.
Big Fun people routinely act in extreme and uncharacteristic ways while in blackout.
Jessika, for example, attempted to kill Ray and injure others with a bullwhip while in blackout (and on Ritalin and santa clause). Another time, while blacked out from tequila, she alternated between beating, biting and kissing Matthew Hart and the Gus at Justin & Burrita's house.
Blackout has not been kind to the Gus either. On Friday, April 26, 1996, he drank gin and vodka excessively with Karen the German Girl, Annie the Taurus, the Brazilian Girls, Zachary and Raphæl and then went into a peculiar sex-fiend fugue state during which he tried to seduce Sarah Kleiner's mother, expressed blunt interest in Nada, praised the beauty of and molested Diana the Redhead, slobbered all over Deya, denied any sexual interest in Jessika, was kicked out of a liquor store, puked, and passed out. Emerging from blackout in Deya's car, he somehow managed to rescue a bottle of Two Fingers from a couple of probing police officers but was unable to prevent them from dumping out a bottle of the light chianti. He then found his way to the Downtown Mall and knocked down every trash can, flyer and newspaper vending machine in front of the Paramount before a crowd of dozens of the youth of today as well as a very concerned Gigi Payne of bozART. Needless to say, he ended up in jail that night.
Matthew Hart has had many experiences with blackout. He says that he and his Waynesboro friends used to all go into blackout together and try to piece together exactly what happened the next day by interviewing witnesses. At times, Matthew Hart has emerged from blackout only to discover that he has a new girlfriend.
Claiming to have been "in blackout" is a frequent ploy used by someone who has done embarrassing things that he regrets the next day, as though not recalling ones actions is any excuse for them.
blackout section-the part of the liquor store, especially the tequila section, where the evening's blackout possibly lies in wait. This term has its origins in the peculiar humour of Matthew Hart.
Blue Bathroom-the second floor bathroom in Big Fun which has walls painted blue and that is illuminated by a string of blue christmas lights. The toilet in the Blue Bathroom has a history of ineffective flushing, and pipes have been known to freeze and burst here. But the bathtub works well. One of the advantages of the Blue Bathroom is that it has one of the few lockable doors in all of Big Fun.
At the infamous house warming party, a red headed teenage boy threw up all over the Blue Bathroom. Whenever this kid is found on the streets of Charlottesville by Jessika or Sara, he is publicly humiliated.
blue bottle-the Arizona iced tea flavour known as Ginseng is, as Matthew Hart has pointed out, probably popular at least as much for the dark blue bottle it comes in than it is for qualities of the drink. Those bottles, you see, can cloak a beverage of any colour in legitimate blueness such that any passerby would be unaware he was in the presence of such publicly illegal beverages as red vino, vodka, beer, or brandy. Jessika is never without her blue bottle, and no one is ever sure what exactly she is drinking.
Bob Hastings-one of the familiar Downtown Mall schizophrenics. He looks to be in his forties and can usually be found chain smoking in or near Chaps. Bob is very friendly, and he greets all guys with "Hey Man" and all girls with "Hey Darling." His enthusiastic laugh commences at the slightest whiff of humour. He has a special fondness for Jessika, though in his delusions he confuses her with Madonna or else with a relative of the Kluges (the richest man in Virginia). He has spoken of plans to marry her and apparently these plans are related to something far greater than simple attraction; Bob claims that the next Christ dwells in his loins.
boil lancing stand-much like a lemonade stand, a boil lancing stand is a booth set up in public where, for a nominal fee, someone can have his boils, pimples, zits, carbuncles, and other infected cauldrons of pus punctured, squeezed and drained by amateur medical personnel. There has as of yet never actually been a boil lancing stand set up by any member of the Big Fun community. To date, the idea of a boil lancing stand is merely a humourous concept from Shira's unique sense of humour.
book burning-a public burning of books that are considered offensive; usually perpetrated by the forces of ignorance. During the summer of 1995 when the Gus advertised a public book burning with flyers on the Downtown Mall, Patrick Reed did not sense that the event was organized in satirical jest and tore the flyers down systematically.
boys in black-this term is used by the Gus at times to refer to some of the guys who hang out at Big Fun, including Morgan Anarchy, Ray Snabley, Jesse, Jasio and perhaps Raphæl. The boys in black are similar in that they all wear big boots, leather jackets, listen to obnoxious music, and play around with their hair colour and geometry. This term was originally used to describe a somewhat similar group of Oberlin punk rockers (see "Harkness").
box o' vino-at some point it was realized that even four litre jugs of the light chianti were not going to provide enough alcohol for a normal night at Big Fun. For only fifty more cents, vino can be bought in five litre boxes. Thus these boxes have become increasingly popular at Big Fun. Jessika likes boxes o' burgundy because of the colour that such vino imparts to her vomit. The Gus, on the other hand, likes boxes o' blush because overindulgence in blush results in minimal hangovers.
After the box o' vino appears to have been drained, someone with an earth sign ascendant is sure to rip the box open and wring out the silvery plastic bag that contained the wine. More often than not there actually is one more glass of vino in that bag.
On May 31st before a small group of curious eight year olds, the Gus was pouring the last few ounces of vino from Fridays After Five vino boxes destined for the trash. But a cop appeared on the scene and made the Gus pour out his salvaged wine. Why? The cop said the liquor license had expired for the event. "Let this be a lesson to you," the Gus advised the children mysteriously.
bozART-a cooperative art gallery located at 211 West Main Street on the Downtown Mall in Charlottesville. For the most part, members are not selected based on talent. There is a combination of very good and very awful art there. The Gus used to function as their Marketing Manager, and he often shuffled art between display at Big Fun and bozART.
brain worm-a hopefully mythical
creature that lives a well-fed existence in the head of its host, munching
brain tissue and leaving tunnels filled with its excrement in its wake.
As the worm passes into new regions, its host experiences hallucinations.
Supposedly brain worms are capable of communicating with each other between
different hosts, co-ordinating their movements much like birds in flight.
This can cause simultaneous identical hallucinations in several different
people, resulting in delusional events for which there are several witnesses.
Perhaps brain worms were responsible for the experience of "wild
turkeys." It is feared by some at Big Fun that the larvæ
of flies may be able to function as brain worms if an adult fly should
somehow succeed at laying an egg in someones eye or nostril.
Brazilian Girls-two sisters
with the last name of Smith from Curitiba
Brazil: Cecilia (a Sagittarius) and Leticia
(aka Nada, a Pisces). They attend Charlottesville
High School but they probably don't fit in so well there; they wear black
clothes and have black hair and black eye make-up and they make their faces
as white as technology in the 90s will permit.
They like music such as Sepultura,
the Cure and Joy
Division and they seem to have an affinity with the dead. This might
all sound like some form of goth, but they do
not want to be so categorized. They are very happy to have discovered Big
Fun, even though in March 1996 they were grounded for going there.
One night Cecilia and the Gus went into a funeral parlour
and Cecilia claimed she was dying of AIDS and could she try out various
coffins. The funeral director, a distinguished southern gentleman, suggested
she come back again during business hours.
brother-a fellow male, especially one at some sort
of crunchy affair such as a Rainbow
Gathering. At Big Fun, the term is used exclusively in a sardonic manner.
Brother Clause-prior to Christmas,
1995, Brother Clause was the name of the Afro-American Santa Clause posing
in the window of the Ujama Market next door to Chaps on the Downtown
Mall. After raising $5 in pocket change, a large ensemble of the Big
Fun community posed for a Polaroid photograph with him, which was then
xerographically enlarged by Farrell and Jennn.
Brazilian Girls-two sisters with the last name of Smith from Curitiba Brazil: Cecilia (a Sagittarius) and Leticia (aka Nada, a Pisces). They attend Charlottesville High School but they probably don't fit in so well there; they wear black clothes and have black hair and black eye make-up and they make their faces as white as technology in the 90s will permit. They like music such as Sepultura, the Cure and Joy Division and they seem to have an affinity with the dead. This might all sound like some form of goth, but they do not want to be so categorized. They are very happy to have discovered Big Fun, even though in March 1996 they were grounded for going there.
One night Cecilia and the Gus went into a funeral parlour and Cecilia claimed she was dying of AIDS and could she try out various coffins. The funeral director, a distinguished southern gentleman, suggested she come back again during business hours.
brother-a fellow male, especially one at some sort of crunchy affair such as a Rainbow Gathering. At Big Fun, the term is used exclusively in a sardonic manner.
Brother Clause-prior to Christmas, 1995, Brother Clause was the name of the Afro-American Santa Clause posing in the window of the Ujama Market next door to Chaps on the Downtown Mall. After raising $5 in pocket change, a large ensemble of the Big Fun community posed for a Polaroid photograph with him, which was then xerographically enlarged by Farrell and Jennn.
bubble, the-this is a term that originated with Morgan and Ray but which is often used by Sara to describe an invisible force field that "encapsulates Charlottesville and its surrounding towns and counties, et cetera." This may be a psychic-energy-manifestation of the underlying soapstone that the Gathering cult claims will protect Charlottesvillians from the alien invasion when it commences.
In the mean time, however, the bubble has some negative side effects. In Sara's words, "An example of the bubble's wrath is the destruction of the Pegger's 86 Ford Thunderbird upon trying to flee to Philadelphia with Zachary." Knowing its wrath, Sara and Shira were more ritualistic prior to attempting to flee the bubble. They "paid a great deal of homage to it, promising to return, and telling it that it was understood and respected." This paid off in that Sara and Shira survived "relatively unscathed."
Not only does the bubble serve as a sort of electric fence, but it also has, according to Sara, "the ability to pluck random people from all over the country, perhaps even the world (see "Brazilian Girls"), and suck them into the Charlottesville scene for awhile. The bubble then convinces them that Charlottesville is a good place to live and so they move there, only to find themselves rotting, held captive and doomed to pay homage to an invisible force field whenever they want to do anything."
In some cases it is difficult to blame the bubble for troubles that attend traveling Big Funsters. For example, on the road trip to and from Big Fun for the June 11th Nomadic Festival, Shira and Sara, motoring in Cheap Wheels, were pulled over by the police going both ways. In both cases they were going in excess of 80 miles per hour in 55 mile per hour speed zones. The second time, on their way back to Philadelphia, their car was also searched and a small knife was found. Small though it was, it violated a Maryland weapons statute and Shira ended up spending the night in jail! Anyone who drives 85 miles per hour is asking for trouble, even if (and I'm not making this claim) the bubble should prove to not exist. In any case, Sara was overheard mocking the bubble on the Big Fun porch only minutes before departing for Philadelphia. If you believe in the bubble, mock it, and then drive like a maniac, you might as well be shoplifting in the buff blindfolded.
burn one-to smoke someone else's santa clause.
burning hay bale-a large cinnamon-roll style haybale that has mysteriously caught on fire in one of the fields near Big Fun. These can be fun to dance around, jump on top of (but don't let your boots get too hot!), and to watch in awe. They burn for hours with an unimaginable intensity.
bust ass-to fart
(pass intestinal gas) with an audible noise.
butt-sexually unattractive. This term is mostly
used by Sara Poiron. Increasingly, Sara has
been using "butt" as a pronoun to mean "that" or "this"
(or even "him" or "her") but never "I."
butt, the-the act of sexual
bwah-one of the utterances Matthew
Hart makes while suddenly undertaking a physically dramatic move. Often,
this involves a samurai sword, hackysack
(perhaps being played with an element of sarcasm) or some other piece of sports equipment.
butt-sexually unattractive. This term is mostly used by Sara Poiron. Increasingly, Sara has been using "butt" as a pronoun to mean "that" or "this" (or even "him" or "her") but never "I."
butt, the-the act of sexual intercourse.
bwah-one of the utterances Matthew Hart makes while suddenly undertaking a physically dramatic move. Often, this involves a samurai sword, hackysack (perhaps being played with an element of sarcasm) or some other piece of sports equipment.