Your leaking thatched hut during the restoration of a pre-Enlightenment state.


Hello, my name is Judas Gutenberg and this is my blaag (pronounced as you would the vomit noise "hyroop-bleuach").


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Like my brownhouse:
   usually and unintentionally unfunny
Wednesday, June 13 2007
Partly as a function of our age, Gretchen and I watch Jeopardy! every weekday, and we quickly form loyalties based on contestants' most superficial of characteristics. I could immediately tell, for example, that the young woman who has been champion over the course of the last few games is a hard core Christian. There was a quality to her default facial expression and her hair style that gave her away as clearly as a tie-dye teeshirt flags a longhaired gentleman as a Grateful Dead/Bob Marley fanatic. Sure enough, during one of those brief segment two interviews, wherein Alex Trebek gets the contestants to talk a little about themselves (thereby helping those of us still uncertain about who to cheer for), the young woman in question talked about the time she visited the Grand Canyon "as a missionary." Oh, lovely: there you are in the parking lot of one of the wonders of the natural world and here's a bratty blond white girl following you around badgering you into agreeing with that the beauty confirms the awesome glory of divinity. "Yeah bitch, it confirms my faith in Saturn, though it still sucks what he did to his son!"
White men are never our favorites unless they are extremely nerdy. Gretchen and I always root for the nerdiest contestant, but when there's no nerd we root for minorities. A nerdy black college girl would be ideal, but they're rare on Jeopardy!.
Unfortunately, today that Christian bitch won yet again, but not before the usually (and unintentionally) unfunny Alex Trebek subtly mocked her for the selfish prayers she'd claimed she'd made for herself during a hurricane.

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