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In these troubled times, it's imperative for Americans to know exactly who their neighbors are. Bob and Sally may look like nice young God-fearing suburbanites with an SUV and a well-manicured lawn, but appearances can be deceiving. Therefore, we urge you to use this form to report any and all un-American and un-patriotic activities and enter your suspect's name into our FBI-linked database of suspected terrorists. The smallest detail, the simplest remark, even a frown at the mention of our great President--could be the clue that will expose terrorists hidden in your community. Please rest assured that any reporting you make of suspected terrorists using this form will be done in such a way as to guarantee your anonymity. |
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