01: antacids and bad pizza and beer - Our last evening in Udaipur.
02: quadrafecta - Savanna says it's not a word. Then her mother throws up.
03: Liam gets us home - He drives like a maniac, but he's a great housesitter.
04: more wrong with me than painless diarrhea - Sick after travel. But at least there are old episodes of True Crime Loser to watch.
05: dropped pins and early to bed - Going through travel pictures while ill.
06: logistics muscles - Even if I was born with them, have they atrophied completely?
07: dozens of small pockets of gas - The nature of my lingering cramps. Also, my stomach (though not my belly) has shrunk.
08: suicidal squirrels - Fat, cute, and kind of stupid, they almost chased themselves into Ramona the Dog.
09: cramps and a sticker - Uncomfortable beneath my ribcage until the Subaru becomes street legal.
10: needing a different bridge - My sixteen mile end-of-day commute becomes 55.2 miles and the Subaru crosses the 220,000 mile mark with a fresh new check engine light.
11: metal detector finds something - Unfortunately, it's just an old rusty piece of wire on this unseasonably warm day.
12: stepping stones across winter - Warm days sprinkled through winter make it a lot easier to take.
13: Microsoft Teams breaks communication - Having just switched from Slack to Microsoft Teams, I can confidently say the latter doesn't promote communication.
14: contrived milestones in time - Measuring one part of my life using a yardstick from another.
15: too many doorknobs - Germaphobes commiserate about the proliferation of things that must be touched.
16: mostly buying organic produce - Though still not always.
17: Pine Bush - In celebration of Gretchen's birthday, a vacation in southwest lower New York State.
18: maximized pre-storm utility - Returning from Forestburgh and Port Jervis just before the snow made Dug Hill Road unclimbable.
19: Noodle Party, 2020 - I am the only man present as conversation turns to hot flashes and ovarian cysts.
20: endless pasta leftovers - The aftermath of the noodle party.
21: two pasta dinners - Undortunately, one was puttanesca. Also, watching the dramatization of the Gypsy Blanchard story
22: Ramona's self control - Though tempted, she manages not to attack Crazy Dave's dogs.
23: sometimes you have to do nice things - Bringing both dogs to work and having predictable grief. Also, nothing worth buying at the Tibetan Center thrift store after a two month absence.
24: free will and Bubby's vs Yum Yum - In the end my feet take me to where the food would be least likely to be greasy.
25: fix-it team - Gretchen is my assistant as I fix problems in two of our rental units.
26: ten minute haircut - Andrea arrives from Washington, DC to commence a Claws marathon.
27: magical realist Russia - I dream I woke up to in a sweat. Also, salvaging both locust and skeletonized chestnut oak.
28: not so good with east coast avocados - Only our friend Andrea can pick the perfectly-ripe ones.
29: olanzapine as a sedative - 10 mg isn't as strong as 100 mg of diphenhydramine.
30: deer excuse for running - My idea of what the dogs were thinking when they ran after a herd of deer while I was salvaging firewood.
31: sprinkled like tiny islands in a sea of impostor syndrome - A rare feeling of workplace accomplishment, coupled with free Chinese food for lunch.